The first strap-on Debbie used on me wasn't worth a crap. Figures, I'm the one that bought it. It was sort of a plastic thing, hollow in the middle and of course shaped like a penis. It was too pliable and its hollowness allowed it to just collapse when in use - not a good thing when it's being put to use on a virgin ass.
The harness was pretty useless too. Definitely not made for the lifelike poundings that Debbie enjoys dishing out. They're not savage or anything, but definitely much the same as a man would fuck a woman. After all, in our case that's what it's supposed to be like anyway.
So the search for the right (if not perfect) strap-on continued. I did some shopping on my own, either on line or in person at sex or fetish shops but there was also some joint shopping ventures. Those always proved more fruitful.
So over the years we've accumulated several "favorites" and they all seem to have the same general characteristics. Basically, the more lifelike the better. Debbie likes a cock with a nice mushroom head, so all of our favorites have that, some bigger than others. They have to be firm but pliable, just like a cock is. There has to be some "heft" to them - the weight of the strap-on should be commensurate with its size or even heavier. According to Debbie, the extra weight makes it feel more realistic. Colors don't always matter to her. She has a couple of feeldoes that are colorful, some flesh colored dildos and some black ones. It just depends on her mood.
Most important - get a good quality harness. Don't skimp on that. Leather harnesses that fasten securely and can hold the strap-on in place are an absolute must.
Personally, I like the feel of the Feeldoe. I've had the most powerful and submissive feeling orgasms with it. It's also the strap-on that was in use when I finally got to experience my first orgasm while in chastity. Here's a picture of my favorite:
Of course, my desires aren't usually taken into consideration.
Debbie and Karen use what they want on me. And I just take it.
I have to admit, it's often a pleasant surprise.